Tides   

Fishing Jokes of the Week-0001

A man and his wife were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. The man was wearing a fisherman's hat with fly hooks stuck all the way around, and an old T-Shirt that read, "On the 8th Day God Created Fishing."

The man asked his wife, "Do you know that guy?"

"Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend." I heard that he took to drinking and fishing every day, starting right after we split up. I hear he hasn't held a job or been sober since."

"My God!" blurted her husband. "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

10464033 688838201171230 8017498751875141043 n"I think I caught a boatload of pinfish ..."

5 Reasons Why Boats Are Better Than Women:

  1. Boats don't whine unless something is wrong.
  2. You can share your Boat with your friends.
  3. If you say bad things to your Boat, you don't have to apologize before you can ride it again.
  4. Your parents don't remain in touch with your old Boat after you dump it.
  5. Your Boat always feels like going for a ride.
ol8uJ6iBilly Bob's "Most excellent craft."  

One recent Sunday, a young boy arrived to his Sunday school class late. His teacher knew that the boy was usually prompt and asked if anything was wrong.

The boy replied no, that he had planned on fishing that day, but his dad said he needed to go to church instead. The teacher was very impressed and asked the boy if his father had explained to him why it was more important to go to church rather than go fishing.

To which the boy replied, "Yes teacher, he did. My dad said he didn't have enough bait for both of us."

5dec2682365c13459ff63dc9b1a566ba

Two guys were on a lake fishing, using worms. One of the guys gets a nibble and reels in his line. He caught a bottle. He uncorks the bottle and out comes a genie. He grants him one wish, so the guy thinks and thinks. Finally he says, "I wish this whole lake were beer!" Poof!!! The lake turns to beer. The other guy looks at him and said, "You idiot, now we have to pee in the boat!"

redneck hot tubRedneck Hot Tub.

Fisherman to his friend: "I caught a 20-pound salmon last week."

"Were there any witnesses?"

"There sure were. If there hadn't been, it would have been 40 pounds."

afishPigfish or "Grunts" are great bait. Wait a minute ...

Four friends went fishing in the Rocky Mountains. They paired off and went to separate rivers. That night, the first team was at the campsite eating rotisserie Largemouth bass and drinking Coors when one of the guys from the other team returned alone, staggering under the weight of a gigantic Northern Pike.

The team at the campsite asked the lone angler, "Where's Billy Bob?"

"Billy Bob had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail."

"You left Billy Bob lying out there and carried the fish back?"

"A tough call," nodded the fisherman, "but I figured no one in their right mind is going to steal Billy Bob."


Enjoy a laugh on us.
The Online Fisherman Staff (the funny half).

 

 



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